Each year at Ferris, thousands of new students come to college with eager expectations of friends, parties, late-night pizza runs, sipping (or guzzling) gallons of coffee until wee hours of

Elise VanRemortel

the morning, and cheering loudly at football games painted faces of crimson and gold. Visions of countless spontaneous adventures encourage them as they haul the entire contents of their new residents up 3 flights of stairs. Although college life brings excitement and new experiences, it can also bring with it loneliness, depression, and emptiness as many realize that the glamour of college isn’t always all it is cracked up to be. Without a solid foundation, the stereotypical college lifestyle is shaky ground for building the next 4+ years of life without intentional living.

What is one key to making your college years a journey of learning, growing, memory-making that is also God-honoring and full of meaningful adventure? As I go into my “super-senior” year as a pharmacy student at Ferris, I have found that making it through college successfully, emotionally, academically, and spiritually is largely influenced by building meaningful friendships. God didn’t intend for his people to be alone. We are a family that is to spur one another on, encourage each other in love, and hold each other accountable; all ingredients for making it through the challenging years ahead.

The first few weeks of college are crucial for finding and connecting with other students. Some of my dearest friends are students that I met during my very first year at Ferris. My advice is simple: get involved! Join a small group, come to Wednesday night His House meetings, stop by the fellowship houses, check out other Christian organizations, explore other Registered Student Organizations, cook meals with your fellow dorm-mates. Do you like basketball? Join an intramural team. Do you love learning about culture? Attend an International Student Organization meeting. Even if you may feel like shutting up in your dorm room, it will benefit you to force yourself out a bit and leave your comfort zone.

Just as important as building friendships is being wise in the friendships that are created. It is essential to connect with at least one close friend that can encourage you in bible reading, build you up in faith, and encourage you as you tackle the obstacles that college life can unexpectedly throw at you. Proverbs 12:26 says, “A righteous man is cautious in friendship, but the way of the wicked leads them astray.” It is much easier to go with the flow than to stand up for what is right. Friends are needed for encouragement, strength, and gentle reminders of what is good. I highly encourage every student, whether a freshman or super-senior, to join and invest in a small group. It is important to build friendships with all kinds of people, but there is wisdom in making those in your closest circle to be men and women that are rooted in the ways of the Lord. “As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another” (Proverbs 27.17).

College: the only years in your life when week-old pizza and Cherry Coke is an acceptable breakfast; doing laundry is considered optional; pajamas double as appropriate cafeteria attire; and coming home to Mom’s home-cook meals never tasted better. College: the only years in your life when you’re surrounded by thousands of friends waiting to happen and everyone is going through similar experiences as they pursue their future goals. These years are unique and precious; difficult and enlightening. College years: don’t waste them. Get involved, make connections, and invest in friendships that will spur you on, build you up, and glorify our awesome God!

I always struggled with the idea that Jesus died for me. I’d heard it numerous times before by numerous leaders, but had never truly believed it. One summer, under the discipleship of Heather and during some of the most thought provoking quiet times in my life, I slowly discovered more and more about the character of God and Jesus. I discovered and claimed two things: one, God loved us. And not like how we love ice cream in the summer or a certain team during a championship. Not even like how we love our friends or our significant others. He loves with agape love which isn’t the kind of love that needs, but that gives – love that doesn’t act because someone is worthy, but makes them worthy. Love that doesn’t love because, or in order to, or for the purpose of, but just because.

The second thing I learned became more clear to me midsummer during STP: God wants us to choose, just as he chooses. At this point in the summer, I began to understand what I was worth. God felt an immense amount of pain and went through thousands of years of work and careful placement on the chance that I might choose Him – that we as people might choose Him.

God had to have known when he put that tree in Eden that there would be some who would not want to love him, but He also knew that I would want to love Him; I, Natasha, would choose Him as my Father, and knowing this, He sent his Son so that I could. This, I realized, is why He did what he did – why he did die for me, and would die for me if I was the only person on the earth.

So when asked what I thought I was worth, I decided that I was worth agape and that I was worth tough choices; I am worth time and energy; pain and sacrifice – a season of pain for an eternity of harvest.

There will never be enough hours in a day to get done all the things you are supposed to get done. That’s just all there is to it. So, priorities must take precedence. I’d be lying if I told you I’ve always kept my priorities straight and managed my time well, especially when I was a full-time student. However, I was a student for a lot of years, and by the time I finished school I had gotten better at balancing my life. There are a few things I’ve learned about this balancing act, which I’m going to share knowing that you’ll probably still have to learn these lessons yourself, the hard way.

First, you need to decide what’s important to you (or what should be important to you). It sounds reasonable, but it might be harder than you think. Is your relationship with God number one on your list? Do you think it should be? If you agree that it should be, even if it’s not right now, it’s important to be disciplined enough to spend time with God daily. Any relationship that you want to deepen requires a significant time commitment; your relationship with God is no exception. If you’re serious about spiritual growth, time with God, praying, reading His word and fellowshipping with other believers needs to happen regularly in your life. Please notice that I think fellowshipping with other believers is important. For me, my weekly small group time was the most beneficial. That’s where I was able to be real with other women about what was happening in my life, that’s where I was spurred on for spiritual growth, and that’s where I had a heck of a lot of fun. During my college years (especially while taking 20+ credits in optometry school), during any given week I often didn’t think I should go to small group, usually due to an upcoming test, etc. However; I made it a priority and went regardless and saw tremendous growth in myself and in my friendships as a result. I also came to realize that if I seriously thought that the extra 1 ½ hours would significantly change my test score, I had bigger problems.

Obviously, as a college student, doing well in school should be a priority. I was ridiculous in my pursuit of academic perfection. This area was hard for me to balance during my entire academic career. I wanted to be a stellar student, but with time I came to realize that grades do matter, but they aren’t all that matter. My advice it to do as well as you can and to work very hard in school. However; to those (like me) who need this reminder, lighten up a little! Make sure to enjoy your life, too. College is awesome and you should make the most of it. For me, this meant going to the gym regularly, spending time with friends, going putt-putt golfing the night before a test (okay, I only did that once), and watching a movie now and then. You need to balance your academics with “life,” or you’ll burn yourself out and be miserable. On the flip side, being a lazy sluggard in the name of “enjoying college life” is unacceptable. Don’t waste your money (or your parent’s money) on classes if you’re not going to make a serious effort at doing well.

I could go on all day about what my priorities were during college, how I spent my every waking minute and how I wish I’d spent my every waking minute. Instead, I’ll just say that you need to decide what’s important to you (or what should be) before your time crisis hits, and be disciplined in doling out your time in alignment with those priorities. My most insightful realization during college, though, was that after God, people are more important than anything else. Keep that in context and within reasonable guidelines (ie I don’t mean parties are more important than studying) and you’ll do well.

If you have any questions or want to chat, you can contact me via email (saraweidmayer@hotmail.com) or by phone (231-580-9114).
Sara Weidmayer, FSU Alumni